you were never too much love–
i just feared i wasn’t enough to be what you were asking for
without even parting your lips.
my energy felt your inquiries all the way from the fifth dimension
asking me to love the parts in you i hadn’t even loved in myself yet;
to heal the parts of you i hadn’t even dared to heal in myself yet–
and it wasn’t for lack of trying.
but, in part, for lack of knowing what parts fo me needed care:
where my soul needed feeding, watering, and sunshine,
before i could pour those same things into you.
i’m sorry you were collateral damage in my unhappiness
you deserved more, and someday, you will find within yourself
the love you wanted that i couldn’t readily give.